Bottomless
Last night was fun.
I was originally supposed to watch Donnie Darko with Steph. We've both been in the city nearly two months and she still hasn't seen my place. Of course, I'm not much better. I only saw hers last weekend when she invited me to her boyfriend Jay's birthday party. Anyway, the poor busy woman bailed on me.
No worries though, since Christen from Humber had organized a bunch of us j-school kids to go out. That occupied the first half of my night. Talking to Christa took the second half.
I met Christen at the Bathurst station and we walked along Bloor to Pauper's. Seeing nobody from our class, we settled into a booth to talk and watch for the others.
Jer appeared not long later, having been on the second floor of Pauper's with Laura and Eden from our building and a few of Laura's friends. They'd all been to a youth poetry reading and Jer had won a book. I'm sure he'll mention it on his blog, so go there for details if curious.
After we all chatted a bit, Jer said he should get back to his beer and the people he'd left upstairs. Christen and I said we would stay down for a bit before following, sending people up his way since there was more room upstairs. Jer left. We talked and sipped our drinks and waited for others to show.
I've come to enjoy sipping whisky straight, and was doing that last night. I don't know how you're supposed to do it, only how I do it.
You hold it for a moment under your nose, breathing in and letting its smell warm you all the way back to the throat. Then you take a sip and hold it on your tongue, feeling its warmth spread. Then you slowly swallow and let it burn its way down your throat, spreading heat down through the chest into the belly.
It only hurts if you don't control it and instead toss it back like a shot. It's perfect for sitting in a pub and taking your time as you chat and wait for more people to show.
We thought Emina had done just that, but never saw her face. She took a few steps in, then turned and left, turning to go upstairs. That was when I saw her. Or who I thought was her. The long, light blue jacket was right and the shoulder length brown hair was right.
Christen thought it was her too.
Eventually Scott arrived and then Andy and a friend of his. We all went upstairs and listened to loud live music for a time, shouting conversation to each other. Wanting something I could drink faster, I switched to rye and coke.
Emina wasn't there, which puzzled Christen and I since everybody was gathered at the booths right by the stairs.
"We're a little light on the estrogen tonight," I commented to her, pointing out that she was the only woman from our class to show up.
Dave showed up after finishing work.
I changed seats four or five times, barely sitting anywhere long enough to finish a drink before someone trapped on the other side of me had to get up to use the facilities or get a drink. Laura and her friends left and Jer eventually convinced everybody to go down the street to the Dance Cave.
That was when I took my leave. Comfortably buzzed, I was about ready to call it a night anyway.
"You're going?" Christen asked as I stood on the street with them all outside Pauper's.
"Yup," I said, grinning. "I don't dance."
"Don't dance?" Jer said and made a noise that sounded like Pfft.
I laughed and waved and turned and left.
Twenty minutes later I was in the apartment. Curious, I booted the computer and went in search of Christa. She'd dropped off the face of the planet earlier that week. I'd seen no sign of her on either of her blogs, on MSN or in my inbox.
I know that's a name that hasn't been mentioned here for a while. And now that I think about it, I never said here what the deal is there. In fact, I rarely ever talk about this with anybody, so you're probably all due an update.
Christa and I saw each other for two months before she left for Australia and got very close very fast. She's been gone for nearly four months. She returns in two. When she returns, we plan to begin seeing each other again. Those words were chosen carefully, so infer whatever you like from them. We stay in touch and still clearly have strong feelings for each other.
But with her on the other side of the planet, we're in limbo and it's slowly gutting me. However, it's a lot better now than it was in the first month that she was gone. After being hurt badly and walking alone for nearly a year, I'd let someone take my hand again. Then circumstances had pulled her around the world. In the first month I was an open wound and everything hurt. Now I'm scar tissue and it's just a matter of waiting it out.
I signed into MSN and went to her old blog as MSN connected. I received a message from her before her blog even loaded. We chatted as I found a new entry on her old blog, a new entry on her Australia blog and an email from her in my inbox.
As we talked, I ate far more than I should have had an appetite for considering that I'd had my three squares before going out.
I fixed myself a sandwich. I ate several handfuls of peanuts. I had a bowl of blueberries and Cool Whip. I ate chocolate. Finally I said screw it and cooked myself a pot of pasta, heated some sauce, buttered some bread and ate it all.
Even then I wasn't entirely satisfied.
I was originally supposed to watch Donnie Darko with Steph. We've both been in the city nearly two months and she still hasn't seen my place. Of course, I'm not much better. I only saw hers last weekend when she invited me to her boyfriend Jay's birthday party. Anyway, the poor busy woman bailed on me.
No worries though, since Christen from Humber had organized a bunch of us j-school kids to go out. That occupied the first half of my night. Talking to Christa took the second half.
I met Christen at the Bathurst station and we walked along Bloor to Pauper's. Seeing nobody from our class, we settled into a booth to talk and watch for the others.
Jer appeared not long later, having been on the second floor of Pauper's with Laura and Eden from our building and a few of Laura's friends. They'd all been to a youth poetry reading and Jer had won a book. I'm sure he'll mention it on his blog, so go there for details if curious.
After we all chatted a bit, Jer said he should get back to his beer and the people he'd left upstairs. Christen and I said we would stay down for a bit before following, sending people up his way since there was more room upstairs. Jer left. We talked and sipped our drinks and waited for others to show.
I've come to enjoy sipping whisky straight, and was doing that last night. I don't know how you're supposed to do it, only how I do it.
You hold it for a moment under your nose, breathing in and letting its smell warm you all the way back to the throat. Then you take a sip and hold it on your tongue, feeling its warmth spread. Then you slowly swallow and let it burn its way down your throat, spreading heat down through the chest into the belly.
It only hurts if you don't control it and instead toss it back like a shot. It's perfect for sitting in a pub and taking your time as you chat and wait for more people to show.
We thought Emina had done just that, but never saw her face. She took a few steps in, then turned and left, turning to go upstairs. That was when I saw her. Or who I thought was her. The long, light blue jacket was right and the shoulder length brown hair was right.
Christen thought it was her too.
Eventually Scott arrived and then Andy and a friend of his. We all went upstairs and listened to loud live music for a time, shouting conversation to each other. Wanting something I could drink faster, I switched to rye and coke.
Emina wasn't there, which puzzled Christen and I since everybody was gathered at the booths right by the stairs.
"We're a little light on the estrogen tonight," I commented to her, pointing out that she was the only woman from our class to show up.
Dave showed up after finishing work.
I changed seats four or five times, barely sitting anywhere long enough to finish a drink before someone trapped on the other side of me had to get up to use the facilities or get a drink. Laura and her friends left and Jer eventually convinced everybody to go down the street to the Dance Cave.
That was when I took my leave. Comfortably buzzed, I was about ready to call it a night anyway.
"You're going?" Christen asked as I stood on the street with them all outside Pauper's.
"Yup," I said, grinning. "I don't dance."
"Don't dance?" Jer said and made a noise that sounded like Pfft.
I laughed and waved and turned and left.
Twenty minutes later I was in the apartment. Curious, I booted the computer and went in search of Christa. She'd dropped off the face of the planet earlier that week. I'd seen no sign of her on either of her blogs, on MSN or in my inbox.
I know that's a name that hasn't been mentioned here for a while. And now that I think about it, I never said here what the deal is there. In fact, I rarely ever talk about this with anybody, so you're probably all due an update.
Christa and I saw each other for two months before she left for Australia and got very close very fast. She's been gone for nearly four months. She returns in two. When she returns, we plan to begin seeing each other again. Those words were chosen carefully, so infer whatever you like from them. We stay in touch and still clearly have strong feelings for each other.
But with her on the other side of the planet, we're in limbo and it's slowly gutting me. However, it's a lot better now than it was in the first month that she was gone. After being hurt badly and walking alone for nearly a year, I'd let someone take my hand again. Then circumstances had pulled her around the world. In the first month I was an open wound and everything hurt. Now I'm scar tissue and it's just a matter of waiting it out.
I signed into MSN and went to her old blog as MSN connected. I received a message from her before her blog even loaded. We chatted as I found a new entry on her old blog, a new entry on her Australia blog and an email from her in my inbox.
As we talked, I ate far more than I should have had an appetite for considering that I'd had my three squares before going out.
I fixed myself a sandwich. I ate several handfuls of peanuts. I had a bowl of blueberries and Cool Whip. I ate chocolate. Finally I said screw it and cooked myself a pot of pasta, heated some sauce, buttered some bread and ate it all.
Even then I wasn't entirely satisfied.
